Limerence
by euphyme
Summary: Christina Yang is an unknown - an anomaly - which makes her a puzzle. A brilliant, scalpel-hungry, beautiful puzzle. Jackson Avery loves puzzles. Yang x Avery.
1. Chapter 1

**AN: Couldn't let go of these two. Let me know what you think, and if you want more. (I'm easily persuaded.)**

 _ **Incandescence**_

She terrifies him. Scalpel in hand or no, she terrifies him.

Jackson knows people. He knows them inside out and top to bottom; he knows how they bleed, which blade to use, which nerves he can cut and which ones could end his medical career, every complication-of-a-complication-of-a-complication. He knew what a Harper Avery was when he was three, and his grandfather's name was thrown around the table as a point of pride. With his pedigree – with _that_ family – and with his education, Jackson Avery knows people. _It's in his blood._

Christina Yang is an unknown. An anomaly. Jackson may still be a new kid at Seattle Grace (and Dr Yang may still relish every opportunity to point it out) but he knows people and Yang doesn't fit.

Which makes her a puzzle. A brilliant, scalpel-hungry, beautiful puzzle.

Jackson Avery loves puzzles.

He's staring at her. Every time she glances up from the machinery holding in place the bones of the girl lying prone on the table under her hands, those ice blue eyes are fixed on her. Not always on her hands – which she would understand given the magic they have worked today, magic hands – but on _her_. She'll think about that later. For now, she fixes on the magic.

He barely hesitates with the fluorine, scintogram coming to life. The whole OR is against her, her boyfriend shouting his doubts at her, and still she does it but _he trusts her._ Avery trusts her. Her, and her hands. One look, and he follows her.

"You rocked it in there." What colour even are those eyes, they looked blue before but in this light-

"Shut up."

(It matters. She pretends it doesn't, that she doesn't want to hear someone say that she's right, but it matters. She has spent so long being argued with, she forgot how it felt for someone to have her back. It matters.)

 _Involved_. What the hell does that even mean, _involved?_

Involved is not something someone who is in love says. Involved is dating, involved is seeing each other, involved is not committed. Owen and Christina are _committed_. So why the hell did she say involved?

Owen, she is with Owen. She is in love with Owen. She is committed to Owen, she is involved with Owen.

She dreams of him that night. Not Owen. Christina is too logical to feel guilty for dreaming of Avery, but it doesn't mean she isn't doing her best to stop wondering why she enjoyed it so much.

"No kiss, I don't know what you're talking about," she says firmly, looking up at those goddam eyes. She swears he wasn't that tall before, not until last night when she had to tilt her head back to –

He smiles a little, not kindly but like he is amused.

"No kiss," he repeats, and it's not quite a statement but it's not a question and God, will he stop looking at her like that?

"Shut up." Walk away. Walk away and stop thinking about his hands, and his jaw, and his stupid magic hands tugging at your waist. Shut up yourself, stupid. Walk away.

Jackson wasn't surprised Yang chose amnesia. His puzzle, his riddle.

"Shut up," she said. That surprised him. She's smart enough to know what to say to rebuff him a thousand ways to Sunday and, what's more, she is confident enough to say them. She could tell him to go to hell, but she doesn't. _Shut up_ means he is not wrong. _Shut up_ means she is.


	2. Chapter 2

**AN: Sorry it's been so long, real med school got in the way. Still waiting on an Avery. Let me know if you like it.**

 _ **Syzygy**_

Jackson can't help but watch her with the trauma guy, watch her take a step back when he moves to put his hand on her back. They're fighting, probably still fighting about _that_ surgery, even when Yang had saved the patient's life.

"Avery, Yang – with me."

It's Altman, the new cardio goddess. Jackson wonders if Yang can see it like he does, whatever there is between Hunt and the new girl; because she's smart, way smarter than he is and she knows it, but he wonders if she wants to see it. How Altman looks at Hunt like he has been missing from her, all big wide puppy eyes, and how Hunt is just simply… _there_. Hovering.

Jackson Avery knows people, and he knows what is happening here. Jackson Avery can bide his time.

He wonders if she notices that he's hovering, too. Jackson's hovering, too.

He chose her. Owen chose her, he chose Cristina. He's devoted to her, to Cristina, he is big trauma head over army boots in love with her and she is still thinking _involved_. She's still thinking Avery, and those stupid blue-green eyes.

This isn't involved, it's commitment and it's real and Jackson stupid eyes Avery is still there. He's always just… _there_. She doesn't mind it, that's what she keeps telling herself. He's a good surgeon. One look from her, and he gets it. He knows what she's thinking; put the two of them in an OR together, and they know what to do. Where Owen is all bluster where Cristina is precision and instinct, and Avery knows how she works because their hands work the same.

 _Badass_. That's what he always says. Not that she needs to hear it anyway, but it matters.

"Shut up."

" _If your mom dies, you'll feel a lot of things. First, you'll feel like, uh, you could have done more to help her, but it's not true. You did everything you could. You won't feel that way, but remember me telling you this. You did everything you could. And it'll hurt every time you think of her. But over time, it will hurt less and less, and eventually, you'll remember her, and...it'll only hurt a little."_

There's a little girl, scared for her mother, who falls (God knows how) into Cristina's care. Avery finds them – because of course it's him, of course the universe decided to play with her some more – and his stupid eyes soften and she may not care much for many people but she knows she has surprised him. One look, and she knows. The kid's mother is dead, and it falls to Cristina to explain it. Some wounds never heal, and just because she's eight it doesn't mean she shouldn't know that now only to save the pain for later. There's a can of worms she doesn't want to open again.

" _Where's the little girl?"_

 _"Uh, Social Services came. We put her to bed in a patient room. Her dad should be here by the time she wakes up."  
_

" _Good. You were great with her today."_

 _"Thanks."_

 _"So, when did your mom die?_

 _"She didn't."_

 _"Your dad, then?_ _" Silence. "_ _I'm sorry if that's, like, too personal. It was just really clear from the way you were talking to her today. It's been a long day. I just thought you might want to talk about it."  
_

 _Her heart was pounding in her ears. "_ _That's very insightful of you. You're a super, super sensitive man. You know, let me tell you what you saw today. I reflectively listened to a patient's concerns. I spoke to her in a language she could understand. I clearly stated the possible complications and probable outcomes. That's all you saw today... me kicking patient sensitivity's ass, so go be someone else's dish rag."_

That's him, forever trying to get under her skin. Because she's good – very good – and that skin is very well thickened but sometimes someone sees under it and Avery did, with one look. So she knows he's trying to be nice or whatever but he's just always freaking _there_ and talking about _feelings_ with those stupid eyes, and she doesn't want to think about that because he's opened that one particular can of worms and if she finds Owen she'll be alright. Her heart is in her throat, memories decades old brought to the surface, and she needs to find Owen because she will not cry here, dammit. Because that's what _committed_ means, she can talk to Owen and he can fix it and make it alright again. Right?


End file.
